Sunday, June 7, 2009

Day 7 of 100

Today has been even colder and rainier than yesterday, and I have struggled with more tears and discouragement.

BUT, (and that is meant to be a BIG but), I have talked and prayed and cried and painted my way through the sadnesses.

When I got home from church, (and some human contacts that jump-started the tears), I heard myself saying, again, "I gotta paint." I went really wet on wet: saturated the page first, and then used liquid watercolors. Got a really soft focus that I like. The colors I just had to use were my sunshine yellow and the passionate pink of my heart.

When I got what I wanted on the page, my insides still needed to paint more, so I pulled out my 9x9 pad . . . used a calligraphy pen to scratch an insistent affirmation all over . . .
then splooshed my AquaMaureen colors . . . they puddled and ran.
The paper wasn't really thick enough for so much water, but then again, my life doesn't seem absorbent enough for all the tears it's had to accept. But it has. And this paper will eventually dry, swollen and not at all flat, but so what?

Once again, something way deep inside me is insisting on being heard and expressed, and words won't do.
Just colors, wet and wild and true.


sharon said...

The pink and yellow one is gorgeous...please call,ok?

Arlene said...

Just so gorgeous! Love your colors too and the way the paint just flows on your pages. I also like how you write about your life as part of your art. Thanks for sharing so honestly.

I am glad Rowena put our links up today too! Now we can all visit each other and encourage each other to keep going.

Anonymous said...

Both of your paintings are beautiful Maureen. I'm sorry your heart is aching. If you ever need an ear I am here.

I love the second one where you wrote Yes all over it. that's an awesome idea for my journal, but without the paint. :)

Leone said...

I'm sorry you're having such a difficult time right now, my heart goes out to you. Painting is such a healing thing to do and the colours you chose are so beautiful.

Amanda Fall - PersistentGreen said...

Love the colors of the first one especially. I think we both made it through yesterday as best we could--sometimes that's enough. :) I'm glad we have each other to lean on.

aquamaureen said...

Thank you, Sharon, Arlene, Tabitha, Leone, and Amanda: Such tender, warm, and loving comments.

Truly, God is meeting my deep need by moving me to paint more, and by surrounding me with caring people such as all of you.

Many many thanks.